Coaching Episode: Drawing the Line with Grace - Confident Boundaries and Open Communication, with Jane
Episode 217 brenda zane Episode 217 brenda zane

Coaching Episode: Drawing the Line with Grace - Confident Boundaries and Open Communication, with Jane

Jane's family's relationship is pretty good, thanks to the many tools she's been learning and practicing in The Stream. Her sons are honest with her, they respect each other, and Jane's husband actively participates in their recovery process. But after both sons were home for a holiday visit, Jane realized she needed to address a boundary violation that occurred during their stay. We spoke for this episode the day her son was coming home, and the conversation could potentially happen - but should it?

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The Difficult Realities of Using The Invitation To Change With A Child Struggling With Drugs or Alcohol, with Brenda Zane
Episode 213 brenda zane Episode 213 brenda zane

The Difficult Realities of Using The Invitation To Change With A Child Struggling With Drugs or Alcohol, with Brenda Zane

Because I sit at a vantage point of seeing many parents working to understand and implement the Invitation To Change Approach (ITC) with their child who struggles with substance misuse, I see things others don't. I hear the frustrations and the celebrations, and I know that while an approach like the ITC is very powerful and effective, it isn't a magic wand.

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Coaching Episode - Dealing With Anger and Disappointment When You Learn Your Child Is Misusing Drugs and Alcohol, with Rose
Episode 207 brenda zane Episode 207 brenda zane

Coaching Episode - Dealing With Anger and Disappointment When You Learn Your Child Is Misusing Drugs and Alcohol, with Rose

Rose has three children, so she's not new to being a mom. But when her son spent six months trying every drug he could find, she stepped into a foreign world of substance misuse and increasing risk. She dealt with the utter shock and disbelief her child had been using substances at all, let alone to the degree she came to realize.

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Coaching Episode: Using Self-Care and Motivation as Tools in Teen Harm Reduction
Episode 201 brenda zane Episode 201 brenda zane

Coaching Episode: Using Self-Care and Motivation as Tools in Teen Harm Reduction

Kelly’s son began smoking marijuana all day, every day after a serious trauma two years ago. Therapy and harm reduction strategies have led them to an arrangement where he is allowed to smoke occasionally, but only in the garage. Her son is smoking much less now, and in combination with therapy, reports he’s stopped using substances as a primary coping mechanism. But after two years of being on high alert at all times, and with the potential of paying for college looming on the horizon, Kelly is reaching the end of her rope, finding it difficult to get enough sleep. Her interactions with her son have become more judgmental than compassionate, and Kelly worries about driving him away.

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Coaching A Mom Pushed To Her Limits, with Olivia
Episode 194 brenda zane Episode 194 brenda zane

Coaching A Mom Pushed To Her Limits, with Olivia

Long before Olivia became a single parent, she was forced to face her own trauma. The heartbreaking challenges she's encountered since then have piled an incredible amount of stress onto an already complex life. If you've been through the wringer with a challenging child and it feels like no one else could possibly understand your journey, Olivia's story is a reminder that the Hopestream Community is full of people who DO truly get it.

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coaching episode: learning to let go, with Tracey
Episode 156 brenda zane Episode 156 brenda zane

coaching episode: learning to let go, with Tracey

In today’s coaching episode, my guest Tracey tells us how her 26-year-old son finally accepted treatment just a few months ago, after more than a decade of alcohol misuse. Tracey is still learning how to strike that balance between support and control, and how to let go of the downward spiral of anxiety about her son’s relapse that, I’m sure, so many of us can relate to.

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coaching episode: the purpose of self-care and importance of acknowledging progress when your child chooses recovery
Episode 149 brenda zane Episode 149 brenda zane

coaching episode: the purpose of self-care and importance of acknowledging progress when your child chooses recovery

In this coaching episode, I’ll meet Alana, whose oldest daughter is now 11 months sober. Alana has watched her struggle — especially during the first two years of COVID — with devastating bouts of depression and anxiety, which have twice been made worse by personal traumas. Things are better now, but Alana still struggles with boundaries, nagging, and self-care.

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three keys to a positive approach for parenting a child misusing drugs or alcohol; courage, confidence, and compassion, with Brenda Zane
Episode 123 brenda zane Episode 123 brenda zane

three keys to a positive approach for parenting a child misusing drugs or alcohol; courage, confidence, and compassion, with Brenda Zane

Research has shown that a positive, non-confrontational approach to helping our kids make positive changes in their lives is the most effective when they’re misusing substances. In this episode I share three keys to shifting your words, actions and mindset in a more positive direction using courage, confidence and compassion. I also share a tip for those times when you revert to old, confrontational ways to help keep things moving in a positive direction.

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3 ideas for combating parenting burnout and empathy fatigue when your child is misusing drugs or alcohol, with Brenda Zane
Episode 119 brenda zane Episode 119 brenda zane

3 ideas for combating parenting burnout and empathy fatigue when your child is misusing drugs or alcohol, with Brenda Zane

We’re getting real this week about the mental and physical burnout and empathy fatigue we can feel as parents when we're trying our hardest with our kids who are struggling with substance use. It's not often talked about but it's real, so we'll dive into what it can feel like and 3 things you can start doing today to turn it around.

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when life feels unfair: staying away from victim mentality when your child is misusing drugs or alcohol, with Brenda Zane
Episode 64 brenda zane Episode 64 brenda zane

when life feels unfair: staying away from victim mentality when your child is misusing drugs or alcohol, with Brenda Zane

There's no doubt that life can feel very unfair when your days and nights become consumed with your child's substance use issues, whether they're just experimenting or in active addiction. We wonder what it would be like to not have a large portion of our hearts and heads filled with worry, doubt, concern and resentment.

This short, personal episode may help you reframe these feelings, while not discounting them or making you feel guilty for having them. You'll discover ways to honor the difficulties in your life while also keeping them in their place and finding joy and peace through the chaos.

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dear friends and family, this is what i need you to know; a shareable episode to open conversations, with Brenda Zane
Episode 60 brenda zane Episode 60 brenda zane

dear friends and family, this is what i need you to know; a shareable episode to open conversations, with Brenda Zane

It can be really hard to tell friends, family members, and co-workers about your situation if you have a child who's misusing substances - first, you're too exhausted to talk about it, also, they probably won't really understand the nuances and depth of the confusion, fear, and helplessness you feel. I created this episode as one you can share with those people in your life who need to know what's going on but you're having a hard time getting the words out.

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four counterintuitive things to do when you're overwhelmed by your child's substance use or emotional challenges, with Brenda Zane
Episode 58 brenda zane Episode 58 brenda zane

four counterintuitive things to do when you're overwhelmed by your child's substance use or emotional challenges, with Brenda Zane

In this solo episode, I share four counterintuitive things that can help when you get to the point where you don't know what to do and are paralyzed and feeling helpless. Getting yourself unstuck and encouraged is an important part of helping your son or daughter, so take a short break, dog walk or drive around the neighborhood and soak up some love and hope from today's show.

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what to do with the guilt and regret when your child is experimenting with or addicted to drugs or alcohol, with Brenda Zane
Episode 54 brenda zane Episode 54 brenda zane

what to do with the guilt and regret when your child is experimenting with or addicted to drugs or alcohol, with Brenda Zane

There are some common emotions parents feel when they have a child who's misusing drugs or alcohol, and two of those are guilt and regret. This episode will provide you with a way to use these feelings to actually improve your current situation and your future. I'll share three steps to take when you're carrying the heavy burden of the past so you don't have to drag it around anymore.

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why your child’s substance use makes perfect sense and four helpful strategies when they’re not open to change, with Brenda Zane
Episode 52 brenda zane Episode 52 brenda zane

why your child’s substance use makes perfect sense and four helpful strategies when they’re not open to change, with Brenda Zane

This episode will give you an alternative view to your child's substance use that might create more space for empathy and an understanding of why they continue in high-risk behaviors. I'll share four helpful things you can do when your child isn't showing signs of wanting to change what they're doing and you're pulling your hair out.

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getting kids un-stuck from failure to launch mode with Mark McConville, Ph.D., author
Episode 51 brenda zane Episode 51 brenda zane

getting kids un-stuck from failure to launch mode with Mark McConville, Ph.D., author

If you're nodding your head at the term "failure to launch" this is the episode for you. Dr. Mark McConville is a psychologist and author of THE book "Failure to Launch, Why Your 20-Something Hasn't Grown Up and What To Do About It." His work over the course of 30 years has shown him that there are some common themes and traits that cause kids to stall or skid out as they move toward becoming independent, healthy, and well-adjusted young adults.

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the hidden goldmine of help for parents of kids with substance use disorder with The Partnership to End Addiction's Denise Mariano
Episode 50 brenda zane Episode 50 brenda zane

the hidden goldmine of help for parents of kids with substance use disorder with The Partnership to End Addiction's Denise Mariano

As the mom of a son who struggled with addiction, including eight relapses, Denise Mariano can empathize with parents at every step on the spectrum of having a child who's misusing drugs and alcohol. She’s the Director of Family Support and Advocacy at The Partnership to End Addiction where she and her team help tens of thousands of families each year with services like a parent help-line, online learning curriculum, in-depth guides and kits, parent-coaching, and online parent support groups. And did I mention it's all FREE?

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three formulas to neutralize negativity and foster motivation in teens with substance use issues, with Brenda Zane
Episode 49 brenda zane Episode 49 brenda zane

three formulas to neutralize negativity and foster motivation in teens with substance use issues, with Brenda Zane

You've probably been there - that moment when something unexpected or horrible happens and you feel yourself reacting in a highly emotional way. It might be finding the stash of weed or empty vodka bottles - whatever it is, it sets you into panic mode and you're not sure what to do. This episode is a short but practical one to help you in those exact moments when the "thing" has happened and you need to handle it, but don't know how.

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a quick way to gain control when crisis hits with Brenda Zane
Episode 47 brenda zane Episode 47 brenda zane

a quick way to gain control when crisis hits with Brenda Zane

You've probably been there - that moment when something unexpected or horrible happens and you feel yourself reacting in a highly emotional way. It might be finding the stash of weed or empty vodka bottles - whatever it is, it sets you into panic mode and you're not sure what to do. This episode is a short but practical one to help you in those exact moments when the "thing" has happened and you need to handle it, but don't know how.

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why do they do what they do? answers on addiction from one who’s lived It, with Stacy Eakman (parts 1 & 2)
Episode 43 brenda zane Episode 43 brenda zane

why do they do what they do? answers on addiction from one who’s lived It, with Stacy Eakman (parts 1 & 2)

Nearly every parent of a child who’s living in addiction has the same questions, like, “why do they keep taking drugs or drinking alcohol when it’s ruining their life, making them sick, killing their family, and pretty much everything in their life?” or, “why do they do things that are so high risk, and obviously have bad outcomes?”

In this 2-part season opener, you’ll hear a mind-blowing story of an all-American baseball star who goes from imagining a Major League Baseball career to being broke, addicted to heroin and cocaine, and stealing anything he could from his loving and caring parents.

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how do you set boundaries and live with natural consequences when your child is abusing drugs or alcohol? Real talk with Julie Jarvis, Ph.D.
Episode 41 brenda zane Episode 41 brenda zane

how do you set boundaries and live with natural consequences when your child is abusing drugs or alcohol? Real talk with Julie Jarvis, Ph.D.

If you've spent any time learning ways to parent a child who's experimenting with drugs or alcohol, or who's in active addiction, you've likely heard about the concept of setting and holding boundaries, and about letting natural consequences happen. But how do you actually do those things when they feel confusing and hard? In this episode, I do a deep dive with Julie Jarvis, Ph.D. into these two specific strategies parents can use in their families.

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