creating a connected, calm life when the chaos is real; getting out of distraction and into alignment, with Lane Kennedy

Host: Brenda Zane, brenda@brendazane.com
Instagram: @the.stream.community

Guest: Lane Kennedy, Host, The Connected, Calm Life podcast

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Episode resources:

Lane Kennedy’s website & podcast, The Connected, Calm Life

Transcript:

Speakers: Brenda Zane, Lane Kennedy

Brenda  01:30

As always, I am really glad to be here with you today. It's always an honor to be in your ears. And today you're going to get to hear a conversation I had with Lane Kennedy, who is a fellow podcaster and coach. She's also a woman among term recovery from alcohol addiction. And basically, I think of her as an all around badass gal. Lane had a successful modeling career. And then as she says, was blessed with a gift of sobriety in her early 20s. She has traveled the globe founded successful companies and has pushed against the glass ceiling. 

Brenda  02:10

Lane's pretty much done it all and after college and building companies and giving birth to her son. Her studies and constant desire to help others led her on a couple of decades of research. She is a lot of things. So get ready. She is a human potential coach, a hormone care practitioner, a DNA coach, a certified Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction teacher, graduate of the neuroscience Academy. She has completed a 200 hour yoga teacher training program and is also a twice-certified yoga nidra guide. And she is a revelation breathwork facilitator and appear certified recovery coach. I wasn't lying when I said she does all the things. Her podcast is called the connected calm life. And you'll hear Lane's calmness that just sort of oozes out of her when you listen in. And that podcast is in all the podcast players. She also has a book called Grace Happens a guide to living fearlessly, which you can get on Amazon. And she also has an online course and does coaching. So there are lots of ways that you'll be able to soak in all the great stuff that Leanne does. I think you'll find this conversation helpful if you're a stressed-out woman who would really like to have more calm in your life. So please now meet my friend, Lane Kennedy.

Brenda  03:45

Welcome Lane to hopestream. I'm really excited for this conversation. I'm excited to get your knowledge and your viewpoint on all things about women and life and juggling it all. So welcome to the podcast. And thank you so much for taking time to spend with me today. It's great to be with you, Brenda. Always. Thanks. Thank you. I would love to just jump in with a quick background on you just sort of give us the scoop on who you are. Maybe how you came to be doing what you're doing today, because I love the work that you do with women, and just sort of give us the baseline and then we'll jump into all kinds of other stuff.

Lane  04:28

Sure. So I live in long term recovery from addiction, alcoholism, and through being sober a very long time. I've had highs and lows. And I noticed that people weren't talking about it, the longer I was sober. And about eight years ago, or when my son was born. I have a mother so I have a son who is neurodivergent. And about eight years ago, I had to hit a different path. I had to find something else to keep me on the planet on the planet, I was really miserable, depressed anxiety, like shocked me to my core, I didn't know how to handle motherhood. And here I am in long-term recovery, like I'm 20, almost 20 years sober at that time. And I'm like not being able to put the pieces together. 

Lane  05:20

And so I had been a daily practitioner of yoga. And I went back to my mat, and it just didn't, it didn't fit for me didn't work. And so I had to find something else. And what I found was meditation and mindfulness. And I opened up a part of me that I didn't even know was living, or I was capable of opening up. And through that portal, I found the work that I do now, which is I help women really reconnect to themselves and their source, their power, because we're living through such times right now, where we are inevitably disconnecting from ourselves. So the work that I do is rich, and it fills my heart. It gives me purpose that I didn't know that I was looking for, and then I'm able to just help women transform. That's so cool.

Brenda  06:19

So you had been a yoga practitioner? So it seems like it might not be a huge stretch to meditation and mindfulness. But what was the turning point for you there? How did you really find mindfulness versus let's say, I don't know, acupuncture or rock climbing? Or you know what I mean? Like, what was it that made that really attractive to you, or that it even made you seek that out?

Lane  06:44

So I was not sleeping at night. I was like, insomnia every night. And finding the practice allowed me to sleep. It last, it allowed me to rest deeply. So yoga, right? Movement, was not doing that for me. And you know, when we finish off a yoga practice will do Shavasana. But it's very short and quick, and it's like, gotta go by, right. And so when I found the practice of yoga, Nidra, and mindfulness, that is when I had the seismic shift, like it just to my core changed me.

Brenda And what is yoga nidra?

Lane yoga nidra is the practice of deep rest. It is a different type of meditation. It's been around since the beginning of time. And we go through layers of the body layers of the system, body. And we go underneath the layers of the brain, right? We go underneath the prefrontal cortex, so not engaged anymore. We're really dealing with the soul.

Brenda  07:56

Wow. So yoga nidra. Just want to make this clearer, because I've seen this before and I've never had anybody to ask, okay, is not on a mat yoga. Is that true? Are you like on a mat doing that? 

Lane  08:09

You could be on your bed, your couch, your yoga mat? Sometimes I do it in my sauna. So you're completely prone, laying out, okay, you make a nest, like I guide my clients into getting a nest and soundside Hello. And sometimes having aromatherapy around just depends on how cozy you want to get.

Brenda  08:31

That sounds amazing. Yeah. To have you come be a guest in we do a monthly guest speaker in the stream community. And that sounds like it would be magical. So yeah, I have to talk about that. Okay, so now we know a little bit more about you. I think we could do probably whole episode on why you decided to take alcohol out of your life. I recently did the same. And just I'm like, wow, this is amazing. Why didn't I do this sooner? So we could do an entire episode on that. But maybe you could just give us a quick snapshot of what life looked like before you did decide to take alcohol out of it. How you did that. And then because I think there are a lot of women and I've done a couple of episodes recently about my decision and just it's something that so many women struggle with. And like for me, it wasn't anything dramatic. So I think that almost made it harder because it was like, I don't know, should I not do this? I'd love to hear a little bit about your experience with that.

Lane  09:42

Yeah. So I was at the height of my career. I had a huge house in the Hollywood Hills. I made a lot of money. I had the pedigree dog I had the cars, the shoes, the closets. The relationship I had, like I on the outside. I looked at Fantastic. On the inside, I was dying a slow death. And I was never quite fulfilled. I was always edgy. And I couldn't understand why, you know, but meanwhile I was drinking every day that I would like, clean it up, not drink, and go back to it, right. Like, there was no rhyme or reason to my drinking. It was just there was a companion. And it got to the point where I just, it doesn't even make sense why I stopped drinking my last glass of white wine, which I don't even like, with my last drink. 

Lane  10:48

And I was lucky enough to be with somebody whose parents just happened to be in a 12 step program. And they took us to a celebration, which happened to be this 12 Step room. And, you know, that was December 31st of 1996. And I haven't had to had, I haven't had a drink again, as a result of that. Right. And I love the idea of staying on a path of recovery, whatever it may be, because there are so many paths. And I don't have to worry about driving drunk anymore. Or doing incomprehensible things. Or finding myself sleeping next to somebody that I don't really love. Right? Like, I was having affairs and like doing all kinds of things. And now, like, married, I'm not cheating. And paying my bills on time. Like I have relationships for more than Yeah, I have a son, right, like, so taking away that. The alcohol that crutch opened my life up. 

Brenda  12:07

That's interesting. Well, again, we could go deep into that. But there's so much more I want to talk to you about. So clearly life has changed for the better. And I think that is a message maybe we'll just leave it at that if somebody is listening and kind of thinking like how in the world could I ever live life without alcohol? I think it's just important to know that there are just normal women out there, feeling it and saying like me, like, wow, I wish I would have done that sooner, just so it's so freeing. It's so great to be 1,000% present, with everything good or bad or hard or easy. 

Brenda  12:48

So anyway, well, thank you for sharing that. And being vulnerable about that, because that is a lot. So now the work that you do really is is helping women. And you know, we've talked a little bit about the listeners of this podcast and everything that they're going through. And calm is definitely one that I don't hear very often when I'm talking to the moms, either in our community or through the podcast, or just in coaching. Calm is not a common word that I hear when I say how are things going. It's usually chaotic, scary, confusing, stressful, you know, things like that. So I think it's just really interesting that you found this area of common, I'd love to hear more about that, because I think we are craving that so much.

Lane  13:40

We are craving it. Every mother I know is pulled in so many directions. And there's a task list. There are silent contracts. It's just endless, right? So when I think about being calm and supporting women, it's about inviting them to come home to themselves. And how do we do that? That's what I teach them how to do. Right?

Brenda  14:10

And how do you do that when there's so much going on around you, and especially for those of us with kids who are struggling with substance use have some mental health issues. It's such a scary place to be when you see your child struggling. And potentially you have parents who are aging that you're trying to take care of. So you're a caregiver at both and trying to be a caregiver of yourself. Then at the same time, it's like wait, how in the world would I ever do that? Like where would I find the time to be a caregiver of myself, let alone let myself grow? Give myself opportunities like that. And so how do those conversations happen with you and your Working with women, like how do you let them know that this can actually happen?

Lane  15:07

We schedule it,

Brenda  15:10

 tell me more, tell me more.

Lane  15:14

we schedule it, we schedule it, I can't express that enough, we schedule it, my date, we call it a date that I have with my ladies, it is a date, we don't change the date, because it's the most important date on the calendar. So that's first and foremost of like just creating a date. And then understanding the importance of that time. It's just not time to reflect. It's actually time to be with yourself. It's time to unwind. It's time to answer hard questions. It's time to really invite a presence or power into your life. And I find that so often, women are just, they're just not doing that. They just, it's again, low priority, no priority, because again, kids come first, partners, parents all come first. But when we are not present with ourself, all those other things that become priority, our relationship starts to suffer. But most importantly, what happens Brenda, is that our relationship to ourselves suffers and then we start to get sick. illness and disease starts to appear. And so the work I do is like untangling that, and rewiring the brain to allow the woman to say, You know what, at three o'clock on Thursdays by the door, or I go in my car, one of my clients like she goes in her car, and she's parked under a tree and she's just there.

Brenda  17:00

Right? And that's good. Yeah. Yeah, I was gonna ask you, I'm glad that you said that. Because what I was going to ask is, what is the risk if we don't do this, because what I hear a lot is I will do that after XYZ. I will do that. After I figure out this diagnosis for my son or daughter. I will do that after they get into treatment. I will do that after they get sober. I will do that after. Do you know what I mean? Like the word after is just so dangerous. So the physical illness I 100% know that because I went through that I got horribly sick. Are there other things that you see happening in women's lives in addition to physical illness? When they don't prioritize themselves?

Lane  17:46

Relationships suffer, Yeah. So yet relationships like they just there's no intimacy, divorce, more distance between kids, the kids become disruptive. It just becomes a ball of mess.

Brenda  18:02

Yeah. I'm curious to know how you help women who are working on this, to explain to the other people in their lives that they're not being selfish, because even if I can get by in my own head, like, Okay, I understand this, because I'm starting to feel sick. I'm having all of these negative impacts. But the minute I start taking this time for myself, guess what everybody around me is like, Mom, what do you mean, you can't pick me up? Or the spouse says, Well, what do you mean, you can't do these 18,000 things that you normally do? Do we just have to explain to them like, Listen, I'm getting sick? Or do you have ways that you found women can be successful in trying to explain to the people in our universe, whoever you're trying to support? I call it the mothership, right? We're the mothership. And everybody kind of like, elevates up to us at times that we're not being selfish. This isn't selfishness.

Lane  19:06

Yeah, it's a matter of prioritizing and having that conversation with them at the dinner table. of you know, I'm not gonna be available on Thursdays from three to six, you guys are gonna have to figure out dinner. You're gonna have to manage on your own. Right, like there are hard lines that we have to draw in the sand. And I help them kind of create those conversations. But the other thing that happens, Brenda is that once we start aligning with our true selves, and really feeling empowered by this connection, we start to interact differently with our loved ones, where they know that something's changing with you. They see it because you're not interacting with them defensively, or dismissively, you're not interacting with them. You're not babying them like there's All different types of ways that moms will interact with kids or with their partners. And that stops happening. And then that relationships begin that those relationships start to change. Because we've drawn that boundary. But most importantly, the relationship with the self starts to change.

Brenda  20:20

Yeah. And then that kind of oozes out of you, right,

Lane  20:24

totally oozes out. Yeah, yeah, the way that we react, right, the way that we don't react, I just think about like, how, oftentimes, mothers will be defensive, or dismissive. Or there'll be a shut down. And when we learn how to be more mindful, and in the moment, that all goes away. So then your person that you're in the relationship with, doesn't have that to work with anymore. They can't feed off of it, right? They're like, we shouldn't do that thing.

Brenda  21:04

Right? Yes, I hear that I hear that, as parents are working on, not getting sucked into the trauma, the stories, the crazy, if you can, really and I'm sure with meditation, and I would love to get your tips on this. As you kind of become more mindful, you can almost step out of the I remember this with my son there were times when he would be kind of going crazy. And I could, I started to learn how to step out of it and almost observe it from like, a third-person perspective. Like, I was watching what was going on? And it was like, wow, that's bananas. She better keep her cool. Because if not, this is all gonna go down really badly. Is that how you use mindfulness? Or is that a way that we can start to like, get more control over this situations?

Lane  21:56

Yes, definitely. Just allowing yourself to kind of rise above or placing like, one second pause, that can change everything, right, your brain can actually change in two seconds. So placing that pause and taking a breath changes everything.

Brenda  22:19

Yeah. Okay, so I love your idea of scheduling. Because I think as moms, we're often really good at that. Because we have these like, incredibly detailed, crazy schedules that we run for our families, but we forget to slot ourselves into that. So I think that's a great tip is to find that time if you're not working, like if somebody can work with you, that's amazing as a coach, or if you're working with somebody else, but even if you can't to, to find that time on the calendar and just explain like, I'm just not going to be around. It's that simple. That simple. Yeah. And it might be hard to start with, I know, because people are used to you being around. 

Brenda  23:03

But you know, like, we just had this retreat for the members in our community in the stream. And it was three days in San Diego. And we had people come from Minneapolis and Louisiana. And guess what, their families are all still intact, like they've physically picked up and got an airplane and left and they have a lot going on. And so I think that just proves that if you want to do it, and you assert yourself and say, I'm doing this, that you can do it, you can totally do it. Yeah. So one thing that I know, women that I work with and talk with, sort of lose, I don't know if I want to say they lose sight of it, but they stop doing as they stop listening to their intuition. And I think especially if you have a child in a situation like ours do, where they're misusing drugs or alcohol, they have some, you know, behavioral issues. That intuition is so important, because it's built into us. It's in our DNA. But why do we stop listening to it? And how do we how can we get better at because we start doubting, like, oh, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. What are your thoughts on like, why don't you do that? And how do we get better at really being good to ourselves and listening to ourselves?

Lane  24:25

I think a lot of it has to do with being out of alignment with ourselves and being distracted by everything that's around us. So what that looks like in real time, is not living in our truth, not being aligned with our values. And then going to Instagram or your social media platform that you love, or even podcast now are just like so distracting. Instead of going on a walk with no phone Nothing to listen to just yourself, right? So you can come back into alignment with yourself. I think it's really important to stand in the shower and just let the water fall over you and not rush, just hit the water fall over you, and to feel the experience of the water and the sensations on the skin. Right? We can have tiny moments, to reconnect with our intuition. Yeah, but we need to take those moments, right, sitting down. And I think this is where the mindfulness piece and what the work that I do is that it's, it's sitting down and looking at the rock, sitting down and smelling the sandwich. Right? Like those moments, allow the intuition to speak. You can't say no to it. Because you're so present with the rock or the sandwich or the tree or the water on your skin. Right? All your senses are open, because there's nothing else distracting you. Does that make sense?

Brenda  26:04

 Yeah, it does. It does. And I think that's a key that's missing is taking the time to do those things. And I'm glad that you said I love tiny moments, tiny moments. Because often what I hear is, I don't have time for that. I don't have time for that. And you're right, you don't have time for it. But then do you also, are you going to have time to go to the doctor when you can't walk anymore? Or you can't raise your arm above your head anymore? So tiny moments is brilliant. 
Lane  26:37

And another tiny moment is on the toilet. Yes, right without your phone, right? So I go in and I work with the first responders, the SFPD. And I tell them just sit on the toilet with nothing. And they were like what? But that is a moment, like no one is going to get to you. And you don't really need your phone when you're on the toilet. Right? You can just be there. And that may sound really crude. But if that's where you're going to find your moment, and you're going to reconnect, so be it?

Brenda  27:16

Yes, well, it's kind of a sacred space. It's one of the very last spaces that you can get away with like I am in the bathroom.

Lane  27:26

I've heard somebody the other day talk about how they were in the bathroom for an hour. And I was like what? And they're like, Yeah, I was just sitting there scrolling. And I thought no, no. So that is a thing people do they take their phone in there. And then they just scroll on the toilet. And I was like no, that has to stop. has to stop

Brenda  27:45

has to stop. Yes. Well, that must be interesting working with police talk about a stressful environment to be in all the time. And so that's wow, that's really fascinating. I think that if firefighters can benefit from this, or please, I would think that just because I think the word mindfulness or if you say like, you know, you could really benefit from being more mindful. It's so nebulous, and people don't understand what you're talking about. So I love these very practical, try sitting on the toilet for five minutes with the right house. So any other tiny moments that you could give us like little tidbits

Lane  28:27

we're all going to the grocery store. Yes. That's what we do, right? So there's always a line in the grocery store. Now. So one of the tiny moments is literally standing there and looking at the back of someone else. And noticing what they have on. And then taking that moment from there, because that's that one moment, right noticing them and recognizing them. They're human, and they're good. As humans, we are good. And then taking that next moment. And gazing down to your cart of goods. Right and investigating one thing. Just one thing, the bread, the onion, the whatever it is, and just keeping your mind on that one thing and allowing that thing to kind of dissolve into you. Like I'm really kind of giving you a practice right now.

Brenda  29:35

Yes, I feel it. I'm like totally seeing it. I'm seeing the avocado in my cart.

Lane  29:42

No, that's perfect, right. And so the avocado dissolves into you. And then you can take the next item and then all of a sudden you're at the front of the line. Because you've gone through the items in your cart. And you're aware of that present moment.

Brenda  29:59

Yeah. And you're not on your phone. Do you think our phones are like the number on reason why oh, just killing it? Oh, we're just we're all over the place. 

Lane  30:09

our brains have not evolved with the technology that is on our planet right now. So that's a whole other conversation, but it is a force that is detrimental to our health on so many levels.

Brenda  30:20

Yeah. Because I mean, I'm thinking of every time I'm in the grocery line, I'm just looking at my phone. 

Lane  30:25

Yeah, no, no. 

Brenda  30:27

Okay, next time I'm in the grocery line, I'm gonna think Lane. And then I'm gonna look at my avocado. And I'm going to let it dissolve into me, okay, those, those are really good, because I think we just do need some, we need somebody to tell us how to do this, or how to make it practical in our lives, because it's easy to write it off. And maybe this is just another way we make excuses. But it's easy to write something like mindfulness off by saying, I don't know, I think you have to go on a retreat to Tibet, and like, sit with monks to do that. And I don't have time to do that, because I have all these 17,000 Other things to do. So what I'm hearing you say is, it doesn't matter. You can be in the toilet, you can be in the grocery line, you can be wherever, and really benefit from I mean, I already feel better just thinking through that scenario, like, Oh, that would make me so much more calm. So that when I get into the parking lot, and that guy takes my parking spot at Petco, I'm not losing my mind.

Lane  31:34

That's exactly right. Calm, calm, connected, right? You're just like, in the moment, right? And I think a lot about like, when you have to go pick up your child from school, there's a line to pick up the kids and the cars and it's chaos. Right? It's yes, there's no perfect solution right there. Could you do it, you have to do it. And every every other mom or dad is there as well, and everybody's rushing, and the teachers are rushing to get you, you know, it's like, just a mess. And so one of the practices that you can implement during that time is before the light or before you get to that moment, is taking a breath right there and holding the breath. And exhaling the breath as you drive into the spot. Right? And then just watching your breath instead of being so distracted by the kids and the traffic. Right? So if you clue into your breath, as you drive through that, you're going to win.

Brenda  32:45

We all like to win. Yeah. And I think that's another that's a space also, where there's a lot of comparison going on, at least I remember. I mean, my kids are my oldest two are out of school, the younger two, I don't necessarily do the high school thing for them. But I do remember, it was a place where I would be looking at everybody's car and thinking, well, how come they have that car? And I have this car? You know what I mean? And then it's like, well, how come? How does she look like that? When she's picking up her kid? And why do I look like, you know what I mean? And it would really get me in my stomach would just be feeling so icky. By the time I left that situation, or you know, soccer practice or whatever it is. That sense of comparison. Not only are we doing it in social media, and like, well, how come her feed looks like that, but we do it in real life too. So if I was more focused on my breath, or whatever it is, then maybe I'm not spending so much time comparing myself to my other person.

Lane  33:54

So we have to turn off this like very critical voice. Right. And that's, that's you do that through training through practicing. So finding your breath is going to definitely help quiet that inner critic.

Brenda  34:13

Yeah, because we just spent so much time just up here where there's just like, our breath is so shallow and you're just almost like hyperventilating by the end of the day. And you don't even realize

Lane  34:24

that horrible it's like not one way to live, especially when you have a demanding family life. And they have needs right and you're just trying to hang on.

Brenda  34:37

You are just trying to hang on like by the skin of your chinny chin chin you're trying to hang on and so yeah, finding any of these just little practices that could help with that. Because then when it does, when your kid comes home drunk or you get the call from the police station, or whatever it is like these big serious things. If you're in a more calm and collected state of mind, it may not change what's happening with them. But it certainly can change how you are going to handle that and how your body is going to process. 

Brenda  35:19

I know that one thing I'm sure that you help people with in your role is this idea of perfectionism. And this sense of control. And I know we are so guilty of that I talked to so many moms who we try to control our kids, we try to control their school, their sports, their all their friends, and all of that, and we try, and we're doing it with the absolute best of intentions. Because we want them to get the good grades, we want them to have the good friend, and we want them to get in the right college, and you know, all of these things, and we want our house to look perfect, and we want our clothes and it's, it's just so much. And then when our kids are in so much chaos. We feel like that starts to reflect badly on us, like, what am I doing wrong, that my child is posting Snapchat pictures of rolling a blunt at a party, what did I do wrong, and so then we try even harder to be even more perfect and more control. And that just makes it really hard to live. What are the things that you help women understand about that, and how they can start to let go of some of that

Lane  36:38

there is a deep need for surrender. And with surrender comes acceptance. So I think those two, they have to go hand in hand. And until there is that surrender, there's going to be a struggle of acceptance of this is my child. And I love them no matter what, and I will be with them, no matter what. But my well-being, I have to, like be in attunement with myself. Otherwise, the critical, judgmental, harsh voice is going to kill my relationship with my child. And it's, it's that's hard, right? Like they are above us. And so I always go back to, like, where is your practice? It starts with mom, the whole healing of any family I am so passionate about is that it starts with the mom. When the mom heals, the whole family can heal. When the mom feels supported, the whole family can feel supported. So when that work happens, again, the relationship between mom and son or mom and daughter and the Snapchat, there becomes an openness of wow, this is happening? And what is the support? Who can support? And how do I get the support becomes much more easily. There's much more awareness on how to go about getting those needs met? Does that make sense?

Brenda  38:29

It does, it does. So that's part of that surrender of saying I don't have to, and I can't do this all on my own. Which is so hard because we want to be able to do it on our own. And I you know, I don't know if that's just a matter of how we're raised or what it is. But we really do have a hard time reaching out and accepting help from somebody else. We somehow feel like that means that we've failed or we're weak or whatever it is. But if you can do that, what I have seen is it rises all tides because the people who you're allowing to help you also benefit from that. Your family benefits from that. And I agree with you and I don't mean to make this like an elitist mom thing. So if you're a dad listening, this is in no way, saying that you are not important because you are massively, massively important, though important. Yeah. And also, I do think that there's an energy around the mom in the home that is so pervasive, and even if you have to fake it a little bit until you can make it true. If you can be that person that is calm, collected, in control, not freaking out, not screaming at the top of your lungs. Not that I would know anything about that. It makes a difference. It makes such a huge difference.

Lane  39:59

It does and it makes it difference in the child's recovery. So when Mom is more connected to herself, and there's a greater sense of love, right? So when you see that picture on Snapchat, there is less judgment. There's less shame. There's less guilt. Right? That information is directly pointed to your kiddo. Right? So you see that picture, and you're like, Oh, this is happening. But I still love them, I'm not going to shame them, I'm not going to blame them, I'm not going to guilt them, I'm gonna have a conversation with them. But the tone in which you speak will be different. The texture of the conversation will be different. Because you're in alignment with yourself, you're attuned to your connected calm life.

Brenda  40:58

Yeah. Yeah, that's huge. Wow, we talked earlier. And I was just sort of asking what your words of inspiration or hope for parents would be. And I love what you said, which is trust, the greater good, and I would just love to have you tell us a little bit more about that. 

Lane  41:20

I think as humans, we're all on an adventure here on this planet. And you may think that's like, weird, but

Brenda  41:30

Oh, it's a heck of an adventure. It is. Right?

Lane  41:33

We're just all over the place doing all kinds of shenanigans. And we all have a life to live. We all have a journey to explore. We all have challenges that we are going to go through. And it is such a great adventure. It's like the quicker that I can get into just accepting that I have little to no control. The better I'm going to feel, and trusting that the greater good. Has my back. makes things so much easier. Right? Like it just it just does with my kid who's a neurodivergent. I'm like, Oh, my God, you kidding me I have to deal with this is going to his whole life is going to be ruined. But I believe in the greater good that some way somehow that will become part of his mission, or that will be part of His purpose. Or he will lead because of it. I don't know. But I believe so much in the greater good. And so his mom's in the stream community just knowing that you're part of a community and that you're coming together, learning on how to support one another support your children. That's a part of the greater good, right? Like, this is amazing. Yeah, so trust that.

Brenda  43:00

Oh, I love that. So good. That's awesome. What do you love most about what you do?

Lane  43:07

Watching absolute transformation. Yeah, having someone be broken, and watching them come back to life in a new way that they didn't even know. Was there.

Brenda  43:25

Incredible. Well, I know that I need to let you go. Is there any particular piece because like, we could just talk all day, forever? I know. Is there any particular like work that you're doing right now that you're super excited about? or anything that you want to share with people for like, how can they get in touch with you? How can they work with you? What's going on in lanes world?

Lane  43:48

Lanes world? So I have a podcast they can find they can find everything over on my website, Lane. kennedy.com. I have the podcast. And there are episodes actually, that launched into the connected comm life. If they wanted to listen to that. That's it's a really juicy 10-day experience. Oh,

Brenda  44:11

so I'll link to that in the show notes. Because, yeah, sound juicy.

Lane  44:15

That's something. It's episode 30 I think it's episode 35 is the beginning of it, I think. And it's just a 10-day experience. And that kind of introduces what it means to feel connected, and calm. And, again, everything's from my website, Brenda.

Brenda  44:39

Okay, awesome. Awesome. Thank you so much. I will put all the information how to get in touch with you in the show notes. And maybe we'll see you as a guest speaker.

Lane  44:50

All right. It's been a pleasure and an honor. Thanks, Brenda.

Brenda  44:54

Thank you so much for listening. If you'd like to go to the show notes, you can always find those at At Brenda zane.com forward slash podcast, each episode is listed there with a full transcript, all of the resources that we mentioned, as well as a place to leave comments if you'd like to do that. You might also want to download a free ebook I wrote called hindsight. Three things I wish I knew when my son was addicted to drugs. It's full of the information I wish I would have known when my son was struggling with his addiction. You can grab that at Brenda zane.com forward slash hindsight. Thanks again for listening and I will meet you right back here next week.